It's Been 10 Weeks
I have been retreating for a while now and taking time to heal. Yes my heart has been broken for some time now, I just didn't know what to do about it. My broken heart has been sitting there in my chest just leaking sorrow until one day out of know where it just hemorrhaged... it was unexpected. I guess I just tucked away all that deep seeded sadness and anger the hurt and fear from all those years my son was an addict, from fighting with my husband about nothing and everything to secretly fighting with my depression. Now that I think about it I never really dealt with any of it, you know the sadness and the anger. I just adapted to the situation and moved on. Having that kind of devastation, heart ache, soul crushing, pure raw sluggish dripping yucky sadness slowly seeping through my body like hot lava type of emotions was and has been damaging over the years. I never looked at it! I refused to look at it. I just wanted to keep moving forward but my that's not how my mind works. I had a nervous breakdown! I real break down. I was hospitalized for seven days and I will forever be grateful to my husband for not giving up on me. For sticking around and slowly helping me piece my broken heart back together again.
It's been 10 weeks of intense therapy and a lot of self care to get me to a good place. I'm not so angry anymore and I don't fall apart like I use to, and I can finally sleep normal. I'm much happier and stronger today! I recommend self care to everyone! Please don't be afraid to step up and say "I need help". There's nothing wrong with seeing a professional. When you've gone through hell and back you tend to come back with scares, deep seeded ones. Take care of your metal health! You are going to get people who think your either faking it or seeking attention. The Doctors, therapist and psychiatrist are ALOT smarter than you think I promise. Some friends or family might even say you are crazy, but you know your not. You have to stop caring about what everyone thinks! Just care about you and your inner circle.
It's been 10 weeks of intense therapy and a lot of self care to get me to a good place. I'm not so angry anymore and I don't fall apart like I use to, and I can finally sleep normal. I'm much happier and stronger today! I recommend self care to everyone! Please don't be afraid to step up and say "I need help". There's nothing wrong with seeing a professional. When you've gone through hell and back you tend to come back with scares, deep seeded ones. Take care of your metal health! You are going to get people who think your either faking it or seeking attention. The Doctors, therapist and psychiatrist are ALOT smarter than you think I promise. Some friends or family might even say you are crazy, but you know your not. You have to stop caring about what everyone thinks! Just care about you and your inner circle.
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